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So I was doing a photo shoot of my sister’s kids this morning and my 6 year old niece waits until we’re alone to ask me, “ZZ, why did you cut your hair so short?” To which I responded, “I guess just because I wanted to. I feel beautiful too!” She then says, “Well, my mommy made me promise her that I would never ever EVER cut my hair like that.”

(Cue the explosions going off inside of my brain)

I told my niece that her mother was being a shallow cunt and that she should never feel like her beauty is solely defined by what she looks like, much less the length of her hair.

Okay, so I didn’t really say that. I didn’t say that because I’m not a giant dickhead.

Thankfully, I possess the ability to recognize when it’s not my place to open a can of worms. Maybe one day when she’s older, I’ll be able to explain to my niece what I think beauty is. Maybe one day she’ll be able to understand that those silly “promises” to her mother really don’t mean a thing and that she can do whatever the hell she wants to do with her hair…. WITH HER LIFE.

My heart hurt the whole way home. It didn’t hurt because I was personally offended… it hurt because my 6 year old niece is learning this bullshit from her mother. I suppose if I had cancer and was forced to shave my head, maybe then her mother would tell her how beautiful I was…. it’s fucked up that I know that to be a fact with the way my sister thinks. But because this is something I chose for myself and it’s different from what her personal taste is, it must be wrong. I could give zero fucks if my sister likes my hair or not, but I cannot stand the fact that she is using my choice as some sort of twisted way to teach her daughter what she feels a woman should be.

This is all the more reason for me to be a kick-ass role model for my niece. I cannot tolerate her being brought up in such a narrow-minded world. It’s not my place to say anything about my sister’s parenting, but you bet your sweet ass that I’m going to show my niece as much as I can that all women are beautiful not matter what they look like.

All Notes

  1. likelettersandsodas said: How is this even still a thing?! I feel like so many women- conservative and otherwise- are rocking short hair these days. I thought we were past this “your hair is your crowning glory” thing. Your niece is lucky to have such a positive role model!
  2. think4yourself reblogged this from loveismy-religion
  3. myworldinboxes said: High five, Z.
  4. arborescent said: I wasn’t allowed to cut my hair until I was 12 - dead serious - because my dad said girls are supposed to have long hair. Thank god that didn’t traumatize me for life. I’ve still only ever had about 4 hair cuts in my life, and I’m 23.
  5. loveismy-religion posted this