Many parents teach children that violence is the easiest way (if not the most acceptable way) to end a conflict and assert power. By saying things like ‘I’m only doing this because I love you’ while they are using physical abuse to control children, parents are not only equating violence with love, they are also offering a notion of love synonymous with passive acceptance, the absence of explanation and discussions. In many homes small children and teenagers find their desire to discuss issues with parents sometimes viewed as a challenge to parental authority or power, as an act of ‘unlove.’ Force is used by the parent to meet this perceived challenge or threat. Again, it needs to be emphasized that the idea that it is correct to use abuse to maintain authority is taught to individuals by church, school, and other institutions.
bell hooks, Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center, pg. 124 (via xbasedrothbardx)